This week I turn 49. I can’t believe that’s MY age. As you get older and you look at your life about choices you’ve made, mistakes you’ve made and situations you can have a ‘do over’ in….there is one thing that I’ve come to realize: it’s never too late to start over.
As Frank Sinatra so eloquently put it “regrets, I’ve had a few“. But hey, life happens right. I’m sure you’ve been through periods of your life when you reflect and think to yourself that you’d make different choices if you could do it again. I can say that for the most part, I wouldn’t change much. Yeah, life sucked being over 600 pounds and every single day was a physical, mental and emotional challenge. But in my heart of hearts I kind of feel like that was the journey I was supposed to go on. It made me into the man I am today. And I kind of like the man I am today. So never apologize for the travelling the road that got you here today.
My emotions run deep and my heart is on my sleeve and I think my emotional intelligence and awareness has allowed me to help others and experience empathy to a deeper level. I genuinely feel for people and have the ability to absorb energy. That might sound a little out there but it’s the truth. Had I not been on my journey through morbid obesity I don’t believe I’d be this way.
That said, my body has taken a s**t kicking and as I turn 49 I am now feeling the effects of carrying more than 600 pounds around for so many years. And through other changes in my life I’ve also slacked off on my promise to myself to stay in control of my eating and physical fitness. And with that in mind as I launch into the sprint to 50 over the next 365 days I will be starting over again. That’s the cool things about life, it’s never too late to start over. Chin up, head down….join me and let’s do this. More details and daily videos will be coming here soon.
It’s never easy to say “I’m sorry”. I still struggle with it. Forgiveness is a powerful thing and the hardest person to forgive is yourself.
Throughout the phases of life it’s easy to dismiss the most important individual in your journey….YOU! As you look back at the experiences, the mistakes, the relationships, the bad judgement, the ‘wish I could do overs’ and all the times you messed up…well…it’s just hard to look passed it. It’s easy to feel completely broken and overwhelmed from it and there are days when it’s so easy to take all the blame too.
Lately, I’ve been looking back and reviewing my life. Geez…there were some tough times, tough decisions and frankly….I messed up a lot. And the more and more I dwelled on the hiccups and bumps in the road I found that my reactions were all negative. Why? Because I was focused on the negative. But when you change the way you think about things, see the triumphs and the mountains you’ve climbed you suddenly see that things are as they should be. Those experiences, good and bad made you who you are today.
And then there is the forgiveness part. When I would go to the gym and workout to lose more and more of the ‘evil’ fat that was on my body I would get so angry. The anger was pointed at me. How on earth could I let myself become a 600 pound worthless sack of crap? As I was working out I would call myself names, tell myself that I didn’t deserve any goodness in life and that everything that happened to me I deserved it. In all the years I felt the world was so cruel to me here I was being the cruelest of them all.
Finally, I started to forgive myself. I had to learn how to do that and it was not easy. And there are still days that I have to work at it. I learned to forgive myself that I am human and I make mistakes and learn about life as I go along. I’ve made amends with myself for the errors I’ve made, punishments I’ve given to myself and hurt I’ve caused. When you can say “I’m sorry” to yourself and truly believe it then you will begin to love again.
Forgive yourself and allow yourself to heal and love.
Once I started forgiving myself I found love twice. Once within my own heart and the other with my soul mate. I will never again question the power of forgiving.
Have you ever had those days where you feel like you’re walking uphill both ways, in a snow storm, with only newspapers on your feet? Anybody that has ever said that ‘losing weight is easy’ doesn’t have a clue what they’re talking about. I’m sick and tired of seeing game shows like The Biggest Loser and hearing the banter on the show and in media that calls out people that battle weight. It actually pisses me off A LOT.
When I was about 14 years old I went to see my small town doctor about having issues with my weight. (This was in the early 1980’s and in those days I was the ‘rare’ fat kid in my class.) The doctor told me there was a fix for me to lose weight….STOP EATING SO MUCH. Wow, thanks tips. You’ve been practicing medicine for 40 years and that’s the best you have???
After battling weight and obesity for most of my life I have an opinion….a STRONG one about weight and happiness. There is a huge difference between being healthy and having optimal numbers on the scale. Any health professional or doctor that tells you the number on the scale must be perfect for your height, gender and age for good health is full of s**t. (my opinion) However, my opinion is based on personal experience and conversations with some of the top experts in health and medicine. There are many factors that need to be taken into consideration for optimal body weight. Including but not limited to bone density, muscle mass and many more. As an example, when I was 240 pounds I was in peak physical condition, results from medical exams were in the 98% area of optimal health and I was strong like a bull. BUT by standards on the obesity charts I was still technically OBESE because I was 80 pounds more than the charts said I should be. BULLS**T!
All this to say, the next time somebody tells you that losing weight is easy then I’d suggest you give them a pair of your runners and tell them to go ahead and walk the mile you just walked. Because your mile was spent on a trail that felt like it was uphill both ways. Be great, be happy and do your best to stay on track today.
On my journey today I’ll put one foot in front of the other and do what it takes to get over the hill…..in both directions…..uphill both ways. Come on…..let’s conquer a hill today. Those small steps you take will eventually lead you to conquering a mountain.
There have been many days where I felt the stress, depression and sadness were too much to deal with. Being told to ‘believe in yourself‘ isn’t as easy as flipping a switch, that is for sure!
When I was over 600 pounds, from the moment I would open my eyes, I simply wanted to close them again and make the world go away. Here’s the thing about the power of belief……it takes practice. You have to make it a habit to give yourself positive affirmations, love and small kernels of hope. Hope is one of the most powerful things in your corner when you align your head space properly.
There are a couple of things you should do to help develop ways to believe in yourself.
1. Remove all the negative people and things you see everyday. There will be those that line up to tell you that you will fail. DO NOT believe them. Remove all the negative feeds and people on your social media feeds. They bring no joy or positiveness to you.
2. Congratulate yourself. Everyday when you wake up and each time you achieve something small, take the time to congratulate yourself. You deserve the credit for ALL the things you achieve…so tell yourself that you did a good job.
3. Don’t let the little stuff get you down. You are a perfect creation but sometimes humanity and free choice get in the way. Forgive yourself and make the next moment your first moment and start again.
These three small things that you develop as habits are the beginning of great things for you. I believe in you !!!! Belief is a choice and you are worth making that right choice.
Welcome to Your First Day. This first post is
always the toughest so let me just get to it. When it comes to getting healthy and finding a passion for life again, I’m here to tell you that I’ve been there and back! You’ve heard that a million times before and chances are the reason you stopped by here today is because you’re still looking for ‘THE ANSWER”. You will find many answers with the stories I share with you. Your First Day isn’t about me….it’s about YOU. And my goal is to get you healthy, happy and most of all….enjoying every single day of YOUR life.
YOUR FIRST DAY is about the energy that you feel on the very first day that you’ve achieved something. Remember what it feels like to be on top of the world. That energy and the joy is incredible isn’t it? You feel like YOU CAN DO ANYTHING? What’s stopping you?? LET’S DO THIS!
When I started my journey almost 14 years ago I didn’t think of the end result, only the small steps in the journey. You can overcome the insurmountable obstacles that you feel you can’t achieve! Maybe its relationship issues, work/life goals, weightloss, depression, self worth, eating/food issues….you can start today and achieve a happy joyful life. YOUR FIRST DAY is not only about weight loss, it is about being healthy on every level. That means attitude, emotions, divorce, work/life balance, eating, drinking and so much more you might deal with.
Please join my mailing list and read or view my blogs and videos as often as possible. As a certified life coach and through my journey of extreme weight loss my discoveries and insights will help you too!
One thing I NEED to be clear about. Your First Day is about achieving health on all levels and is NOT just about weight loss. I’ve been up and down in my weight for years but my HAPPY FACTOR stays constant. And that’s what I will assist you in achieving.
TODAY IS MY FIRST DAY …..will you join me?
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Make today YOUR FIRST DAY !